2 posts tagged “journal”
Where or when is “the line” crossed?
It is hard to determine when we are crossing the line because the line is constantly being redrawn. Instead, we have a set of morals that shift dependent upon the whims of society, and as time goes by these morals change. Years ago, the line was very different from the lines we have drawn for ourselves today. The thought of scientifically creating a life belonged to the realm of science fiction, while today we are unsurprised to see cloning performed – essentially creating that life. Much of the new technology we have at our disposal would have been unheard of: medicines and medical equipment, visiting the heavens in rocket ships… Because these things were unheard of, just the thought of being able to do them had to be “crossing the line.” If this trend continues, and our morals and technology shift the way they have been doing, then it is entirely likely that by the time we have reached a point where what we could consider “crossing the line” today, it will most likely be acceptable then. However, with that being said, I do believe that there are certain things that will never be considered acceptable. For example; the complete genocide of the human race, enforced sterilization biological weapons/warfare et al. It is my belief that science should be used to help humanity, not to harm it. Causing deliberate harm unto others would be something I consider “crossing the line.”
I took myself on a date, as it were -- this in itself is surprising because as a single mother of two finding the time to do something like this isn't an easy task. Somehow I managed to find the time while house-sitting, and when both of the kids were tucked up in bed. I grabbed my palm pilot, loaded up with a couple CDs in mp3 format, and my sketchpad and went for a walk.
Out of the city there's a different ambience, the night is still and quiet, but for all the lack of street lights it's still breathtakingly brilliant. The light of the stars and the moon shimmer, and if I let my eyesight go just a little fuzzy I can almost convince myself that it's a group of fairies dancing in the bush. I prefer that idea than the reality of he breeze stirring the snow enough to create that magical glimmer.
The sound of Nelly Furtado flows through the ear buds, rattling around in my head and I take a moment to listen to the words.
You speak out all you feel is defiance
All you need is some self-reliance.¹
More truthful words I can't think of. Self-reliance… the thought sparks and as I settle into the tree house, my legs swinging over the balcony I won't let my daughter near, and I begin to sketch. I'm no artist, but like anything I do I do it for the enjoyment.
Take the lead or follow
I want to feel the light shine on me.¹
Doesn't everyone? I pause a moment, considering. I'm shy by nature, maybe I don't truly want the light to shine on me -- at least not all the time. Maybe every once in a while.
The song changes, and I can't help but laugh because really, this song is most definitely one that could be handed in as a dramatic monologue.
At first I wrote it "dear you," then it turned,
"to whom it may concern."
I began it in this way because
I needed to express through these words,
How deeply I was hurt²
Which song? The Letter, by Heather Headley. Reminds me of my ex-fiancé, and I almost wish I knew how to get hold of him to let him hear it. Maybe I am still bitter. Scratch that… I am bitter. I switch the song on purpose, because really, who needs to be feeling melancholy on such a beautiful night? And besides, this is my date with myself.
So afraid to open your eyes, hypnotized.³
Evanescence plays, dark and angsty… hard, and wild. Somehow, where The Letter made me feel melancholy this song makes me sing along, head bopping in time, legs swinging through the air.
Heaven shine a light down on me.³
The moonlight shimmers over the snow, and I glance at the time displayed on the screen of my palm. Hmmm, it's been a few hours, and the baby will be waking up soon to nurse. I guess it means that my date is over. Hey, I got to draw and write… and to be honest I feel a lot more relaxed now than I did before.
¹Nelly Furtado, "Afraid"
²Heather Headley, "The Letter"
³Evanescence, "The Only One"
